Friendship Day is celebrated around the world on the first Sunday of August. According to the Friendship Day resolution adopted by United Nations in 2011, it was decided to “forge a strong bond of friendship among people of various countries irrespective of their race, colour, gender, religion, ethnicity, and other such factors.” Dux Youth Development and Student Support takes this a step further, by pointing out that not all friendships are created equal.
Why Do You Think It’s Important To Have Good Friends?
Time and again, studies have proven the enormous impact your friends have. The people you associate with “influence almost every behaviour - from what you wear and what you buy to what you watch, what music you listen to, and more. Happiness, academic success, and even how much you weigh are all affected by the company you keep.” (Anne Vogel, 2015)
What Defines A Good Friend?
Being clear about what you would like to (give and) receive as a friend allows you to set and maintain boundaries. As with goals, ambiguity is the enemy of success. Having healthy boundaries does not make you a mean person - people will always be more important than money, projects, and work. And while you cannot control other people’s emotions, moods, or actions, treating others as individuals with feelings and their own personal challenges says more about you than it does about them.
So, grab a pencil and piece of paper, and list the qualities you value in a friend. Some examples might include, “makes me feel good when I’m with her or him”, “respects my beliefs”, “doesn’t make fun of me”, “doesn’t try to get me to do things that are bad”. “doesn’t talk about me behind my back”, “is trustworthy and loyal”, “helps me be better than I am”, “helps me to see the fun in situations”.
This question, of course, leads to the follow-up – are YOU, by your own definition, a good friend?
At this point, you may feel that you either:
a) need to make better friends, or
b) need to detox from some friends.
Whichever path you are on, there is a video for you from a human behaviour scientist, Vanessa van Edwards:
You Have a Friend in Dux
“Dux dʌks noun
The top pupil in a school or class.”